Ill admit it; I am a long time, chronic procrastinator. I am a true professional at putting things off. If it can be done tomorrow, then why should I waste my time doing it today? Besides, if I sleep on it, Ill be better able to handle it once the time comes to actually do it.

I have developed a complex system of rationalization which enables me to put off nearly any deadline, thereby freeing up my time in the immediate future for more important things. These include, but are not limited to;

• Thinking up excuses for why I have not even started the project that is now overdue

• Franticly writing articles on procrastination to fill my past due writing quota

• Watching The Flintstones and Looney Toons on Cartoon Network for inspiration

• Keeping up on the latest world news on Fark.com

Someday I will write a program that helps me manage the complicated mental dance steps required to keep my life in some semblance of order. It is going to require advanced AI routines to predict the wild flowcharts of logic needed to keep track of what needs to be done yesterday in a way that wont interfere with what needs to be done two weeks ago.

Once the program is complete, I will have a simple daily schedule which will show me at a glance exactly what tasks I can safely postpone for at least 24 hours. Im sure the program would sell like hotcakes if I ever got around to marketing it.

Ill finish this article later, right now I have some important research to do...